Put on the New Self, Part 2

(12) So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; (13) bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. (14) Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. (Col 3:12-14)

This set of verses pick up where the previous ones left off. Paul is now focusing on what God will be expecting of the believer. He is explaining what the believers should be clothing themselves with. If we belong to Christ, then Paul is letting the believer know what true Godly character is, ending with the most important of them all – love. (John 13:34, 15:12; Eph 5:2)

Having Character

So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; (Col 3:12)

Definition: ‘those who have been chosen’ – The Greek word, eklektos { ek-lek-tos' } means picked out, chosen; chosen by God, and to obtain salvation through Christ.
‘those who have been chosen of God’ – This will always be a disputed topic because of the divide between Calvinists and Armenians and the differences are not going to be settled by this blog. But what we see clearly in Scripture here and many other places is that believers are chosen by God. They are also called ‘elect.’ And if believers are ‘chosen,’ then they didn’t become that by their own choosing. And one can see the same being said in Eph 1:4, where Paul wrote, “just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world.”
Scripture presents the concept of the ‘election’ of believers in many places: Eph 1:4-6; John 6:37, 6:44; John 15:16; Rom 8:28-30; Acts 13:48; 2 Th 2:13; 2 Tim 1:9. It should also be pointed out that Israel is called chosen in the Old Testament: Deut 7:6, 14:2; 1 Chr 16:13; Ps 105:43, 135:4; Isa 41:8, 44:1, 45:4.
Definition: ‘holy’ – The Greek word, hagios { hag'-ee-os } means sacred, holy. Louw and Nida define it as “pertaining to being holy in the sense of superior moral qualities and possessing certain essentially divine qualities in contrast with what is human—‘holy, pure, divine.’” [1] John MacArthur defined it as “set apart or separated.” [2]
Definition: ‘beloved’ (‘dearly loved’ – NIV) – The Greek word, agapaō { ag-ap-ah'-o } means to welcome, to entertain, to be fond of, to love dearly. And Louw and Nida define it as “to have love for someone or something, based on sincere appreciation and high regard—‘to love, to regard with affection, loving concern.” [3]
Concerning believers being ‘holy,’ MacArthur adds that since God chose believers and specifically drew them to Himself, empowered them with the Holy Spirit, they are expected to be different from the rest of humanity. I think we’d all agree with John MacArthur that, “When believers fail to act differently from the world, they violate the very purpose of their calling.” [4]
And when God calls believers ‘beloved,’ He intended to demonstrate His inexplicable and unfathomable love for His people, those whom He has chosen. (Eph 1:4-5)
‘Chosen’ – What was once used to describe Israel in the Old Testament (Deut 7:6, 14:2; 1 Chr 16:13; Ps 105:43, 135:4; Isa 41:8, 44:1, 45:4) is now used to describe those who have come to faith in Christ. As we see in Rom 9-11, Gentile believers are now grafted in and the focus has now shifted, at least for a time, from Israel to the Church. (John 15:16; Acts 13:46-48; Rom 8:33; 2 Tim 2:10; Tit 1:1; 1 Pet 1:1)
Definition: ‘heart’ (‘cloth yourselves’ – NIV, ‘bowels’ – KJV) – The Greek word, splagchnon { splangkh'-non } means the bowels were regarded as the seat of the more violent passions, such as anger and love; but by the Hebrews as the seat of the tenderer affections, esp. kindness, benevolence, compassion; hence our heart.
Definition: ‘of compassion’ (‘of mercies’ – KJV) – The Greek word, oiktirmos { oyk-tir-mos' } means compassion, pity, mercy, bowels in which compassion resides, a heart of compassion.
If we are to have a heart of compassion, then we should desire to meet the needs of others, so much so that it is a believer’s lifestyle. (Matt 25:31-46)
Definition: ‘kindness’ – The Greek word, chrēstotēs { khray-stot'-ace } means tolerance towards others, kindness.
“The kind person is as concerned about his neighbor’s good as he is about his own. God is kind, even to ungrateful and evil people.” [5] (Luke 6:35) And, it is kindness that leads to repentance. (Rom 2:4; Tit 3:4-5)
Definition: ‘humility’ – The Greek word, tapeinophrosynē { tap-i-nof-ros-oo'-nay } means having a humble opinion of one's self, a deep sense of one's (moral) littleness, modesty, humility, lowliness of mind.
Again, from MacArthur, who pointed out that it was Christianity that elevated humility to a virtue. [6]
Definition: ‘gentleness’ – The Greek word, prautēs { prah-oo'-tace } means mildness of disposition, gentleness of spirit, meekness.
When a person is gentle, they are willing to suffer injury instead of inflicting it. As we see in Gal 5:22-23, gentleness is something that God produces in His people.
Definition: ‘patience’ (‘long suffering’ – KJV) – The Greek word, makrothymia { mak-roth-oo-mee'-ah } means patience, forbearance, longsuffering, slowness in avenging wrongs.
“Patience is the opposite of resentment and revenge.” And, “the patient person does not get angry at others.” [7]
These are all the qualities that believers are instructed by Paul to ‘put on,’ to clothes ourselves with. These are to cover the new man of God and become his nature, what the world is to see.

Forgiving Others

bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. (Col 3:13)

Definition: ‘bearing with’ (‘Forbearing’ - KJV) – The Greek word, anechō { an-e'-kho } means “to be patient with, in the sense of enduring possible difficulty.” [8] Strongs gives a meaning of ‘to hold oneself erect and firm, to bear with, endure.’ MacArthur sees this as “to endure, to hold out in spite of persecution, threats, injury, indifference or complaints and not to retaliate.” [9]
‘bearing with one another’ – So, Paul is telling us to be patient with each other, and don't get frustrated with each other because God was patient with us. If a brother or sister accuses you, endure, don’t lash out. (1 Cor 4:12, 1 Cor 6:7)
‘forgiving each other’ – Again, as people, we are going to make mistakes in how we deal with each other. We are to be a forgiving people, especially with our brothers and sisters in Christ.

‘whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you.’

Paul’s encouragement is for believers to have the character that seeks to love and forgive each other, to refrain from retaliation against others. We are to demonstrate the character of Christ in all that we do.
Albert Barnes says that we are not to harbor any malice of ill will towards those that revile us. We are to be ready to do good towards those that complain against us, and we are ready and willing to forgive all who ask for it. And after the incident, we are to treat that person with kindness as if there was no injury to us at all. That is the forgiveness we received from God and that is the forgiveness we are to extend towards others. [10]

Clothed with Love

Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. (Col 3:14)

MacArthur sums up this verse with this, “In keeping with the motif of putting on clothes, love is the belt or sash that pulls all these things just mentioned together (cf. Phil. 2:1-5). Love is the most important moral quality in the believer's life, for it is the very glue that produces unity in the church. Believers will never enjoy mutual fellowship through compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, or patience; they will not bear with each other or forgive each other unless they love one another. In fact, the way to sum up the commands of 3:12-13 is to say, ‘Love one another.’ Paul said in Romans 13:10 that ‘love does no wrong to a neighbor; love therefore is the fulfillment of the law.’ To try to practice the virtues of 3:12-13 apart from love is legalism. They must flow from love, which in turn is a fruit of the Spirit-filled life (Gal. 5:22). Nothing is acceptable to God if not motivated by love (1 Cor. 13:1-3), including knowledge (Phil. 1:9), faith (Gal. 5:6), and obedience (John 14:15). Love is the beauty of the believer, dispelling the ugly sins of the flesh that destroy unity.” [11]

(12) Clothe yourselves therefore, as God’s own chosen ones (His own picked representatives), [who are] purified and holy and well-beloved [by God Himself, by putting on behavior marked by] tenderhearted pity and mercy, kind feeling, a lowly opinion of yourselves, gentle ways, [and] patience [which is tireless and long-suffering, and has the power to endure whatever comes, with good temper]. (13) Be gentle and forbearing with one another and, if one has a difference (a grievance or complaint) against another, readily pardoning each other; even as the Lord has [freely] forgiven you, so must you also [forgive]. (14) And above all these [put on] love and enfold yourselves with the bond of perfectness [which binds everything together completely in ideal harmony]. (Col 3:12-14 AMP)

Footnotes

Johannes P. Louw and Eugene Albert Nida, Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament: Based on Semantic Domains (New York: United Bible Societies, 1996), p. 744, p/o Logos Bible Software, Ver 10, © 2026.
Johannes P. Louw and Eugene Albert Nida, Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament: Based on Semantic Domains (New York: United Bible Societies, 1996), p. 292, p/o Logos Bible Software, Ver 10, © 2026.
Ibid, p. 155.
Ibid, p. 155.
Ibid, p. 156.
Johannes P. Louw and Eugene Albert Nida, Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament: Based on Semantic Domains (New York: United Bible Societies, 1996), p. 307, p/o Logos Bible Software, Ver 10, © 2026.

All Greek words utilize the Greek Lexicon, part of the Online Bible, Computer Program, © 1987-2026, Thayer’s Greek Lexicon, Blue Letter Bible and/or Louw and Nida’s Greek-English Lexicon in Logos Bible Software, Ver 10, © 2026, unless otherwise referenced.

All Scriptures quotes are from the New American Standard Bible, 1995 Revision, unless otherwise noted. Verse links from Blue Letter Bible.

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